#4 T.E.A.M

Updated: Oct 12, 2019


Recovery from childhood trauma takes T.E.A.M. Time Education Application Money

Time Recovery takes time, however what is less recognized is that time itself is not sufficient, it is what you actually do with the time that is important. You will need to set aside a significant amount of time specifically for your recovery and find a therapist specializing in trauma, there are only a few, and then spend as much time working with them as is possible. General therapy, 12 step groups etc. will not be sufficient if the trauma is the result of severe and long term child abuse including sexual abuse, physical violence, emotional deprivation or psychological abuse etc, as recovery requires very specialized knowledge and skills. Spending time on yourself can go against toxic messages given to you by your abusers - which can make recovery more difficult as it is erroneously seen as ‘self indulgent’ There are no 'one minute' processes that will do the recovery for you - but if you work through the issues involved in your personal recovery you can process, and finally integrate, what happened to you. At which point the past will no longer have the hold it once had over you. Education You will be learning about what actually happened to you in your childhood so that you can recover from the fear, shame and low self esteem that got set up because of it, you will be learning how to connect with yourself and maintain your internal boundaries, you will be learning the stages involves in actually working through what happened to you, you will be learning how to connect with , and relate to, people and the world in a whole new way - and most of all you will be learning to love who you really are. Application - 'it will work if you will work' Recovery takes application and effort. Application to consistently self- care, application to attend therapy sessions regularly, effort to explore issues at depth and perhaps travel long distances to see a specialist or attend workshops. Spending effort on yourself can be difficult as you may have internal unconscious messages not to focus on yourself and your needs. You might also need to budget your energy so that you can get the most out of healing opportunities. Some of the common ways to avoid recovering is to read books about recovery without doing the exercises, or go to a few 12 Step Meetings, or think about recovery now and then. 

If you have significant childhood trauma just doing this will not be sufficient for you to recover. Money You cannot recover on your own, your childhood trauma happened in relationship with others and it is in relationship with safe enough others, including your therapist, that you will heal. When you work with an experienced therapist they are going to facilitate your escape from the traps of your childhood that are laid down within your unconscious - however specialists will have undertaken an in depth recovery process of their own, together with a decade or more of training and experience - and this cost money. You will also need to almost certainly buy a number of books and attend courses and workshops to give you the information, tools and support you may need. For some people low self esteem can make it difficult to spend money on themselves, and whilst it is important not to overstretch your budget, it is equally important not to limit yourself as a false economy . Consider what your priorities really are and also make sure that you are not repeating patterns of deprivation from the past. Sometimes I have heard a person say that they cannot afford to go into recovery, whereas the reality may be that they cannot afford not to.